Artist

My throat aches 
From silently screaming.
I can't find a tear
But know somewhere 
They're streaming.
I keep throwing rocks
But the water won't ripple.
Which way is up?
How can I know, 
If gavity's fickle?
I recognize brilliance
But never create it.
Something has happened
And now I'm sedated.
Like I'm drowning 
In water that's only luke warm.
I don't know my skin 
From the sea.
Or calm 
From the storm.
I'm lost in the grey. 
I long for definition.
I'm an artist
Who envies 
The mathematician.